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How Far Do You Take Modesty?

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How Far Do You Take Modesty?

Post by Bren on 25th February 2013, 8:50 pm

First topic message reminder :

This could turn into a debate which would be cool with the dead debate faction...Anyway, how far do you take modesty? I personally don't see anything wrong with wearing shorts showing my knees if I'm at home or with some guy friends but I probably wouldn't around girls. These days it's not hard to be a stumbling block to someone and I wouldn't want to cause a girl to stumble.




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Re: How Far Do You Take Modesty?

Post by Pound Foolish on 1st July 2013, 1:28 pm

Suzy, you're absolutely right. The problem is, you're absolutely wrong.
It's true people can switch from jeans to long skirts... but why would they?
It's nice you like them, and you look great in them.
But not everyone does (some girls look laughable in them.) And if they like the style they have now, why change? You've never said before that jeans are immodest, though that's what you seem to be hinting... On the other hand, you've said before that you don't.So what was your point?
Anyhoo, as to the Bible, I'm trying to make a summer habit of reading a page or more a day, so far it's going well.
Now, again, I'm not really disagreeing with you. I'm more trying to figure out what you're hinting here.

But what exactly is my concern with modesty, anyways? Why exactly should I read the entire Bible thoroughly looking for stuff on modesty? Is that really all that important for guys? I mean, it's pretty accepted for us to go around with nothing on but shorts, so... Wink
Maria wrote:k.....whatev....lol I wanna please my Lord in all that i do, even this issue, but you guys make it sound as if a woman's body is bad. It's not bad!

High-five!


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Re: How Far Do You Take Modesty?

Post by Thor's Hammer on 1st July 2013, 1:37 pm

Pound Foolish and Maria we should make a magazine on dressing. Wink Yeah I don't see why people spend so much time arguing about dressing. I think it is mainly a personal conviction on what you should where based on Scripture.



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Re: How Far Do You Take Modesty?

Post by Sunshine on 1st July 2013, 3:14 pm

Thor's Hammer wrote:Yeah I don't see why people spend so much time arguing about dressing. I think it is mainly a personal conviction on what you should where based on Scripture.
Ditto.  I don't mind putting in a little discussion on my part, although I'm not trying to declare everyone wrong.  Wink  The problem is, when I put in a "little" discussion, it's a little more than a "little," as I always tend to write long posts, pms, and emails (I've been known for my 9-page snail-mail letters, too).  ...which is kind of strange, because I'm really pretty quiet when talking in person...

Amarinda wrote:so the people who won't wear tight clothes how do you swim?or do you even swim?
I wear an athletic shirt and some longer sports shorts over my swim suit.  Smile  For those of you who are thinking, "Ugh!  How dreadfully awful to wear something like that swimming!" - yeah, that's what it felt like at first.  But that was the requirements that my parents gave us.  And really, I'm used to it now.  I'm actually glad that they require that of us, because I personally don't feel comfortable  swimming more exposed.  Note that those are my personal family dress standards, and I am really not against those who feel differently.  Smile  I will say-- it's really fun when I go swimming, and everyone is taking off their "over clothes" and I dive in the water with my complete outfit.  Everyone's like: o.O ...and I'm like: happy dance

Pound Foolish wrote:It's true people can switch from jeans to long skirts... but why would they?
Because there are still some girls who enjoy femininity in the sense of dress.  Yes   
As conservative as my family may seem, I did not grow up wearing skirts and dresses at all, except on Sunday at church.  As I get older, though, I'm starting to enjoy wearing every day skirts more.  (I don't think I'll ever want to wear skirts all the time.)  There's something in the joy of knowing that God created me to be a woman, and the joy in wearing a nice and dainty skirt.  =)



Something else I'll add to the discussion (you see what I mean about how I write long posts Wink):
Note: I am not, by any means, comparing this with people on here.  I'm comparing this, with the general world around us (which is in a very sad state, right now).


As my older sister was searching through the old-fashioned everyday dress patterns online (ya' know- the ones that actually have sleeves, a higher neckline, and a skirt that goes down to your knees), she pointed out to me: it's like the women back in the 1930's and 40's actually had some dignity.  They weren't readily throwing themselves at any guy out there, and exposing every inch of their bodies.  They actually kept their feminine mystery hidden.

I think that's pretty cool.  I mean, I don't think that I'll ever want to wear skirts and dresses all the time (pants and capris are really practical for me), but the fact that wearing nice clothes that actually cover me, aren't just a personal preference, but show that I have some dignity in not exposing my body.  To be frank, I don't care if the world thinks I'm "really uncool" or "take modesty waaaay too far" for wearing skirts, or capris on hot summer days.  I like being a girl.  Curtsy


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Re: How Far Do You Take Modesty?

Post by Suzy on 1st July 2013, 3:42 pm

Some people switch from jeans to skirts because they feel jeans ARE immodest. As for me, as you know, not only did I wear skirts growing up- I wore cape dresses. I'm not saying that I feel that those who wear pants are going to hell, (not my place to judge) but I do feel they can be immodest. Pants for women now are designed to fit snugly around the bum and hips, and made to slim and show the curve of the leg. When a woman walks in them, it defines and displays the womanly details of her body- and don't tell me, as you, a guy, Pound Foolish, have never noticed that. Now don't get me wrong, though, there are also looser pants made for women that aren't as appealing, but geez! Who wants to wear those?
Also, in Deuteronomy there is a verse that says- "A woman must not wear men's clothing, nor a man wear women's clothing, for the LORD your God detest this." 
Now, a lot of people can argue with this one, mostly because it is believed that men in that time period wore a robe type garment which would be more portrayed like a dress- but point is- men wear pants and it would look totally socially unacceptable in our day and age for them to wear skirts &\or dresses. Women CAN wear dresses, and have for as far as history can see, only recently have women started wearing pants when this whole "equality with men" and the war movement changed it all. Personally, I think, pants are kind'a iffy...and I don't want to risk doing something that God actually DETEST. Detest is a strong word.

de·test

Verb
Dislike intensely.

Synonyms
abhor - loathe - abominate - execrate - despise - dislike


Also, Pound Foolish, about thoroughly reading your Bible and looking for scriptures on modesty- that wasn't necessarily directed to you; but more for the girls here, seeing as being modest is more directed towards us women, anyway. But you still need to read your bible you little heathen, wine-drinking, lowdown Catholic scumba- kidding, kidding. Wink  BUT! Men do need to be a tad careful, too, when it comes to modesty. Even though women don't have as much of a uh, imaginative or lustful minds as the opposite sex, we do occasionally see a tanned, fit and shirtless guy and think "Oh wow!", and, well...sometimes it can downgrade from there. But anyhoooo...

Modesty is a very valuable and marvelous treasure, that we, as humans, have just thrown in the trash. We are ripping away our self respect, dignity and class just for a little bit of the wrong kind of attention. God forbid.


Last edited by Suzy on 1st July 2013, 3:59 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Re: How Far Do You Take Modesty?

Post by Maria on 1st July 2013, 7:34 pm

Hahahaha thanks my dear, ;)I always like a good high five now and again. May i speak my true opinion on this??? I would rather not be fully modest. Sometimes,I HATE being modest, cuz other wise, people look down on me. I hate being looked down upon. I love feeling like i'm beautiful, and wearing my short shorts makes me feel so much better about myself. I know it's wrong, but i do. And guys then notice i'm not just flirty, and they don't just call me "cute and pretty", they finally notice i got a little sass. They finally see i'm not just some little 14 y/o. I hate this feeling. I know i know, it's wrong.....but sometimes, in this culture, it's hard staying strong


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Re: How Far Do You Take Modesty?

Post by Suzy on 1st July 2013, 8:43 pm

I know how you feel, Maria. The "sexy" label is everywhere. If you're not sexy, you're not "cool". It's everywhere you go- on tv, the movies, at school, lordyy...just walking around in wal-mart I see way more then I care to view. But, while walking around showing off a little extra feels good, it doesn't last. Yeah, boys will turn their heads- but what for? Do they want you for the beautiful you are, underneath, inside? Or do they just want what they see on the outside? 
Being modest is difficult. VERY difficult. Even I get made fun of occasionally. But...it can also be very rewarding. Just the other day a young man came up to me and said- "I never really did get this whole modesty thing much, but after watching you- I think I understand now and I just wanted to tell you thank you and to never, ever change." After that he told me I was beautiful, and that he wished more girls would act and dress this way. I was very humbled and flattered, and it was very encouraging...escpecially since I had actually just been struggling on that very issue. 

Even though it may not always 'feel' good, modesty will always win in the end.


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Re: How Far Do You Take Modesty?

Post by Maria on 1st July 2013, 8:44 pm

Uh huh.....it's fine for you....and alot of girls, some girls just aren't so lucky


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Re: How Far Do You Take Modesty?

Post by Suzy on 1st July 2013, 9:08 pm

Aren't lucky? Beg pardon?


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Re: How Far Do You Take Modesty?

Post by Maria on 1st July 2013, 9:17 pm

Nothing...........


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Re: How Far Do You Take Modesty?

Post by Suzy on 1st July 2013, 9:19 pm

Ummm...alrightyyy, then. If you would ever like to further explain- I'm at your service.


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Re: How Far Do You Take Modesty?

Post by Amarinda on 1st July 2013, 9:41 pm

Bren wrote:Well, seeing as my name was mentioned, I'll chime in. I can't really say a whole lot on the female bathing suit aspect. My mom wears shorts and a shirt. That's the best suggestion I have.

 Oh my gosh Bren I can't belive you said that well actualy i can seeing as the way you are but whatever well I think shorts and a T-shirt is umm....that's stupid..i mean you are going swimming hello? and you are a boy so you wouldn't get it. my mom likes me to be modest and she's fine with me wearing a tankini.

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Re: How Far Do You Take Modesty?

Post by Shalom on 1st July 2013, 9:50 pm

You guys have some interesting ideas.....I.Hate.This.Topic.

Why am I looking at it and posting on it then.......O_O

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Re: How Far Do You Take Modesty?

Post by sing 4 joy on 3rd July 2013, 7:19 pm

Mind if I join? 

speaking of the whole swimsuit thing, I have a modest swimsuit.  My mom sewed it for me. It is a one piece hi neck sleeved dress type thing that goes below my knees, and shorts underneath. And I love it cause I am not all  trying to stay wrapped up in my towel till I get in the pool.... Mrgreen


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Re: How Far Do You Take Modesty?

Post by Amarinda on 3rd July 2013, 10:02 pm

uh sounds uncomferterble why would you wear that in the pool? and why if you are wearing a normal bathing suit why would you have to rap a towel around yourself before you get in the pool?




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Re: How Far Do You Take Modesty?

Post by Sunshine on 4th July 2013, 12:51 pm

sing 4 joy wrote:Mind if I join? 

speaking of the whole swimsuit thing, I have a modest swimsuit.  My mom sewed it for me. It is a one piece hi neck sleeved dress type thing that goes below my knees, and shorts underneath. And I love it cause I am not all  trying to stay wrapped up in my towel till I get in the pool.... Mrgreen

 Ooh, I hope that maybe some day I'll be able to sew my own swim suit.  I've always wanted one with a swim skirt!  Smile  But right now, stretchy fabric is way past my sewing level.  =)


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Re: How Far Do You Take Modesty?

Post by Thor's Hammer on 4th July 2013, 1:13 pm

Okay some of you in my terms are over modest. Not that I look down on it. I actually admire it to some extent. I don't swim with my shirt on and don't put it on for a while after I get out of the pool.



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Re: How Far Do You Take Modesty?

Post by sing 4 joy on 4th July 2013, 1:49 pm

Amarinda wrote:uh sounds uncomferterble why would you wear that in the pool? and why if you are wearing a normal bathing suit why would you have to rap a towel around yourself before you get in the pool?

 Oh, Amarinda, It is compfortable, And the reason i felt like I had to wear a towel around my self, was cause i was embaressed. There is nothing wrong at all about wearing a normal swimsuit.


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Re: How Far Do You Take Modesty?

Post by Amarinda on 4th July 2013, 3:18 pm

Thor's Hammer wrote:Okay some of you in my terms are over modest. Not that I look down on it. I actually admire it to some extent. I don't swim with my shirt on and don't put it on for a while after I get out of the pool.

 Thor what you said is EXACTLY WHAT I AM THINKING!!!!

@sing 4 joy so umm you think it's inmodest to wear a bathing suit without a towel around you before getting in? wow...
and yes I know there is nothing wrong with normal bathing suits.

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Re: How Far Do You Take Modesty?

Post by sing 4 joy on 4th July 2013, 8:26 pm

Amarinda wrote:
Thor's Hammer wrote:Okay some of you in my terms are over modest. Not that I look down on it. I actually admire it to some extent. I don't swim with my shirt on and don't put it on for a while after I get out of the pool.

 Thor what you said is EXACTLY WHAT I AM THINKING!!!!

@sing 4 joy so umm you think it's inmodest to wear a bathing suit without a towel around you before getting in? wow...
and yes I know there is nothing wrong with normal bathing suits.

 No No NO! Embarassed  That's not wha I meant...D\\'oh! Oh, well...Rolling Eyes I meant that I personally did not like it because I am not used to wearing, (don't nail me on this, I couldn't come up with a better word....) skimpyclothes. sorry i did not make myself clear!


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Re: How Far Do You Take Modesty?

Post by Thor's Hammer on 5th July 2013, 1:59 pm

Oh skimpy I don't count a one piece women's swimsuit skimpy...



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Re: How Far Do You Take Modesty?

Post by Amarinda on 5th July 2013, 3:56 pm

Thor's Hammer wrote:Oh skimpy I don't count a one piece women's swimsuit skimpy...

 HAHA Blitz I think you have been reading my mind! i totally agree with you, Blitz, a one piece bathing suit IS NOT SKIMPY!

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Re: How Far Do You Take Modesty?

Post by Sunshine on 5th July 2013, 8:00 pm

Amarinda wrote:
Thor's Hammer wrote:Oh skimpy I don't count a one piece women's swimsuit skimpy...

 HAHA Blitz I think you have been reading my mind! i totally agree with you, Blitz, a one piece bathing suit IS NOT SKIMPY!
I'm not sure that that's what Sing was trying to say.  (Correct me if I'm wrong, Lyn)  I think she was trying to say that she herself is not used to being so exposed.  For some girls, like her and me, we really prefer not to walk around in plain view of everyone when we are exposed so.

Amarinda wrote:
Thor's Hammer wrote:Okay some of you in my terms are over modest. Not that I look down on it. I actually admire it to some extent. I don't swim with my shirt on and don't put it on for a while after I get out of the pool.

 Thor what you said is EXACTLY WHAT I AM THINKING!!!!

@sing 4 joy so umm you think it's inmodest to wear a bathing suit without a towel around you before getting in? wow...
and yes I know there is nothing wrong with normal bathing suits.
There are varying ways for being modest.  Just because some of us prefer to be little more covered in our swim apparel, doesn't mean that you must do the same (and it doesn't mean that you are wrong, either!).  No  Nor need you pity those who choose to do so.  It's all about what you get used to.  To you, it might seem bothersome and annoying while swimming, but for others of us, it's really no different.  
Even if I'm are missing out on something, I don't mind.  To me, it's more important to keep my own body covered more.

Like I said above, there are varying ways of being modest.  If all we're going to do on this thread is freak out at each other's standards, then I really don't see a point in the whole thing.


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Re: How Far Do You Take Modesty?

Post by AudPod on 5th July 2013, 8:32 pm

I agree, Sunshine. Let's make this more a friendly debate than attacking each other's opinions.




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Re: How Far Do You Take Modesty?

Post by sing 4 joy on 5th July 2013, 9:12 pm

Sunshine wrote:
Amarinda wrote:
Thor's Hammer wrote:Oh skimpy I don't count a one piece women's swimsuit skimpy...

 HAHA Blitz I think you have been reading my mind! i totally agree with you, Blitz, a one piece bathing suit IS NOT SKIMPY!
I'm not sure that that's what Sing was trying to say.  (Correct me if I'm wrong, Lyn)  I think she was trying to say that she herself is not used to being so exposed.  For some girls, like her and me, we really prefer not to walk around in plain view of everyone when we are exposed so.

Amarinda wrote:
Thor's Hammer wrote:Okay some of you in my terms are over modest. Not that I look down on it. I actually admire it to some extent. I don't swim with my shirt on and don't put it on for a while after I get out of the pool.

 Thor what you said is EXACTLY WHAT I AM THINKING!!!!

@sing 4 joy so umm you think it's inmodest to wear a bathing suit without a towel around you before getting in? wow...
and yes I know there is nothing wrong with normal bathing suits.
There are varying ways for being modest.  Just because some of us prefer to be little more covered in our swim apparel, doesn't mean that you must do the same (and it doesn't mean that you are wrong, either!).  No  Nor need you pity those who choose to do so.  It's all about what you get used to.  To you, it might seem bothersome and annoying while swimming, but for others of us, it's really no different.  
Even if I'm are missing out on something, I don't mind.  To me, it's more important to keep my own body covered more.

Like I said above, there are varying ways of being modest.  If all we're going to do on this thread is freak out at each other's standards, then I really don't see a point in the whole thing.

 Thank you Thank you miss Sunshine! I did not mean to offend anyone or anything by this. I simply meant what Sunshine said above, and said it the best way I knew possible.

 and I don't judge anyone for feeling differently. That is just my own opinions for MYSELF, and I understand not everyone will agree with them for THEMSELVES.  Wink


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Re: How Far Do You Take Modesty?

Post by Pound Foolish on 5th July 2013, 10:33 pm

Okay, Suzy, I'm back. Beware. Beware. Be-warrrre!
So, you've given me some fine thoughts on discretion and Biblical truth.
Now let me respond with a history of pink.

A History of pink
By the illustriously wise Pound Foolish
You say, until relatively recently, pants were only worn by men.
Very true. Did you know that's true of pink as well?
Back before the limelight was put on gay marriage, and people weren't yet obsessed with gender differentiation, colors were colors. They shifted back and forth in styles between genders. Young children of both genders wore dresses.
Around 1985, it started. Stores championed color sex-coding as a new style trend.
It wavered back and forth, whether blue or pink was more suitable to which gender.
At last, this was released:
“The generally accepted rule is pink for the boys, and blue for the girls. The reason is that pink, being a more decided and stronger color, is more suitable for the boy, while blue, which is more delicate and dainty, is prettier for the girl.”
(Source, the Smithsonian.com)
At last, of course, pink gradually slipped into conventional girliness. Other countries followed America's suit. (In France, for example, pink was generally considered a boy color until America reversed the trend.)

Wasn't that great? You see, every once in a while, I put aside the comedy and get educational... Just in a weird way.
Now then, you can surely see the point. Gender differential clothes is a matter of perception. It is not an inherent quality.
Clothes have no gender.
If you think this is moral relativisim, then consider things more carefully.
Suzy, your eyes are very beautiful. That is an inherent quality, a gift God gave you. Now, suppose I told you, "Oh, Sweetest Sweetie Louie, my pet, your eyes are so beautiful."
Then, suppose you pulled the eye out of your head and gave it to me for a present.
Suddenly, the eye wouldn't be beautiful. It still an eye. But it is now perceived as gross.
The eye never changed. Our perception did.
That's the way of the world. Morality is always the same. But our conventions change. If you took gold from a gold-panning booth you paid to visit, you'd be doing nothing wrong. But if you were to break into the National Gold Reserve and run off with the gold, you'd be in trouble.
The gold wouldn't change. But the situation, a conventional theft, would be different from a conventional gold-panning. The morality didn't change. It's always wrong to steal.
Morality does not conform to convention. It can be conventional for babies to die, but it's always immoral to kill.
It's always immoral to cross dress. That never changes. But, the convention of what goes with which gender does.
It doesn't matter how recent the different trend may be, nor what it is. Perhaps sometime in the future, guys will start wearing bows. And if it's accepted as men's adornment, that'll be totally fine... Weird, but fine.
And if convention doesn't change acceptability...
You'd better throw away your pink clothes before you go straight to Hell.


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